Wonder/Wander

poetry

I wonder if he knows
he is the reason why my eye twitches-
every time honesty is put on a pedestal

My eyes trail the words “trust me” as they float from his mouth
into the air- only to make its way to the open window
and jump to its death

Cowardice like the man who spoke them.

I wonder if he knows
he is the reason my natural instinct is to always be alert
Like a police officer beckoning that seatbelt to be undone
or a server waiting for the cheap family of 8 to leave

Rather than roasting under the hot spell of love
I search for shadows attached to his heels
to prove my deepest anxieties were true

I wonder if he knows
he is the reason my feet ache
From always being on my tippy toes
so that I am never looked down at again
because I’d rather my toes ache
instead of my neck

I wonder if he knows
Just like the spider that bit spiderman
A superpower rooted from my wounds
and I am thankful, because without it
I’d probably have nothing to write about.